Today was a very interesting day (as the title more than implies)! First my friend Joann came yesterday and stayed the night. She lives in Arkansas but has stayed so connected through all of the craziness of the last two and a half years. She’s been a true friend for sure! She didn’t walk away when she wasn’t sure what to do with us when our live drastically changed in a moment; she just kept walking with us…even from a distance…as so many have.
We talked, ate, pulled a few weeds in the garden and took Chris for a walk through the park here behind the apartments. It was so nice to hear another voice in the house for the weekend. I’m not real sure why the weekend can wear on me so much heavier than the week can, but it tends to. This one is about gone and I’m ready to get some sleep and start a new day tomorrow!
Something really strange happened today. I have been part of a group for most of the last two years plus – called Daily STrength. I found it and joined a couple of the online support groups there. I won’t forget the first person who talked to me on the site. His name is Shaner and he was injured in a fall accident himself. He was given so little hope of survival that the doctors had his mom sign off on his organs…but here he was writing to me, continuing his education and helping to encourage others to never lose hope! Among his first words to me that still ring out were the doctors do not have the last word! That statement brought me lots of encouragement. I’ve met other wonderful friends on DS too. (Hi Tori!!)
Today a new person wrote me. She has a son named Chris as well. He was in an accident when he was a teenager and she’s been caring for him for 7 years now. She was reading my story and wanted to “connect” as she felt she could encourage me. Our conversations are “your Chris” this and “my Chris” that…it’s kinda funny!
I’m ready to embrace whatever God has down the road. Her Chris has not spoken since his accident, yet he still continues to improve…I am saddened to think the thought what if Chris never speaks again? Honestly, I had not thought about it. I just keep working with him (which btw – he was very vocal with me today when I upset him! I swear when I asked him a question his grunt was in direct response!)
Emotions tried to suck me under…maybe I am only deluding myself…but I just can’t believe God would silence Chris’ voice. I wanted immediately to take the things I do have and get them out for all to hear! I have all his writings and some of his music (and power of attorney!) and wanted to begin to put them in books so all could share and hear the things God had already put in this young man!
So I am kinda in a weird spot tonight…totally trusting what God promised…yet trying to prepare since I don’t really know what’s ahead – or how far it is ahead! And you know what – I’m not sure it matters from here…I’m going to trust God with what each day brings…that’s all anyone can do!
I’m so very moved by some of the things in the news the last few days. A young football player lost his life, a sheriff is shot and may lose his sight in one eye…devestating tornados in Missouri today…this all rips at my heart as I know how your life can be ripped away in an instant…how fast things can change. All the things that used to be so important only boils down to one thing….relationship…with God first and with others… and really I am not sure there is even one more thing in this life that matters…not even one…
So I had this question today while my mind was wandering about in all the “things” and whether they matter or not… I want to spend my energies on the things that are eternal.. why spend it on anything else? I thought of the scripture – laying up treasure in heaven…and how our works are tried to see if we used wood, hay and stubble; or if we used gold and things that will stand in the fire….how do we build treasure for eternity? It cannot be simply going to church – or even feeding the poor – it cannot be healing the sick or even raising the dead…how do we build for eternity? How do we build what really matters?
…sorry no answers here yet… but at least I am thinking about it.. and I will let you know if I come up with something! lol! I want this cave experience to drive me into His presence…I am thinking that’s the key. And not some flakey shakey all over the church feeling that doesn’t bring about real change in my heart and life…but an intense knowledge and understanding of God and His ways.. that effectively brings about eternal changes in me… changes that last…changes that effect eternity…in me…just thinkin’…