Yeh, it was that type of crazy night. Chris slept well – so well in fact, that I didn’t sleep at all! Seriously. He was sleepy yesterday anyway and ran a fever most of the day. Then last night early – like about 8:30 he went into his mode of what I have labeled his “brain injury sleep.” He is out like – limp as a noodle, mouth open and you cannot wake him up! This time I didn’t try though.
So I got a lot of work done and decided if he needed to sleep that hard he probably really needed it. So at feeding time I just sat the stuff in there and waited for him to wake up on his own. I’m thinking that if he’s sleeping hard – his body probably needs it in the healing process. Finally about 12 he stirred. I changed him and fed him and he barely moved. Then he went right back into that deep really weird sleep again. So I stayed up and worked until after 1 o’clock this morning. Then I didn’t sleep heavy but woke up every little bit and ran to make sure he was still breathing! (they never really grow up do they? lol)
And that’s how it went until about 4 when he woke me up because he was uncomfortable. Then I crashed and when I woke up I figured that is was probably 9 or so and our whole schedule would be off for the day! …it was not even 7 yet! lol! EArlier I was like should I call the doctor? But what will I tell them? he’s sleeping weird…? That’s when I laughed at myself and wondered what I would say if I called 911! Come check my son – he’s sleeping!!!? Okay – so I had to laugh at myself.
The really good thing though is that he woke up this morning and has been really awake all day so far! He even ate a good breakfast! WEll, at least I feel better now!
Sundays are unusually difficult times for me anyway. I suppose it’s from all the years that I went to church so regularly or faithfully – not sure which anymore. So I thought about having my own service here – maybe even putting it on youtube or my broadcast site…May still plan on doing it sometime. I just miss a lot of those normal types of things so much sometimes. I have to really reel my emotion in and suppress it so it doesn’ get the best of me! I try to make the best of this cave I’m living in!!
I thought about Job again this morning and read the first couple of chapters. He was rich (I didn’t have that going for me for sure) and still lost everything. At least I’ve seen the Lord begin to restore some stuff in my life – I didn’t have much when the tragedy hit and now I have had so much I got to give some away! That’s been fun really!
I’m just kinda ready for what’s next. I have crazy dreams still – maybe it’s even the stuff I’m not dealing with because I don’t know how. I quite using skype because of all the invites to other countries…but people are asking me about going to India in my dreams now – while I try to explain to them why I cannot! I’ve had to lay all that down…and if God wants to raise it up okay- but I ain’t diggin up nothin’!
It’s simply time to keep the faith! KEep my trust focused on Him and not the circumstance… and suck it up to make another day….again.