Relying on God

This is a crazy spot I am living in right now. It’s like everything is in forward motion and standing still at the same time. I’m moving, Chris is improving…but it’s all sitting still. The move is still on but the apartment needs a couple of things fixed before we can sign the lease…

The home health dropped the ball again. They were supposed to fax Chris’ records to Valir to document the improvements he’s made so we could see if he could get a little help with rehab. I called Valir yesterday and they had not received anything. So I called home health. I’ll call them again today to see if I can keep them moving. Plus they still have not sent me the records I needed to apply for respite care monies…it’s all very frustrating…and don’t even get me started on supplies which did not come last month as promised! I’m chunking 20 dollar bills at Sam’s again this week!

Anyway, sometimes I feel like I am everybody’s mother. Like I am having to remind everyone to be responsible and just do their job. That gets very frustrating and honestly, I just don’t feel like trying to be nice anymore. Nice doesn’t get things done or so it seems.

So when things get all stopped up like this again I have to just slow down and remind myself that God is my source. I must rely on Him to supply everything I need. He will see to it that the move happens on His time – and that does not always match mine of course! lol! He alone is my strength…and today I will rely on HIm for everything – even the directions to take on who to call and what decisions to make. Until I hear from Him and have that peace I talked about…I will just wait…

It’s like it’s not enough to just have to deal with all the emotions of seeing my son like this every day. Because we don’t have money and the driver didn’t have insurance we have to be oppressed…I will rely on Him for true freedom…He is my source and today I will have to remind myself of that perhaps all day long…but His provision will be enough – more than enough. I am so glad He is near…

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