He is Faithful…

Here I sit ready to face another day. I have no idea at this point how Chris will do today. He has slept pretty good the last couple of nights and that helps me a lot!! Will he completely tone out on me or be limp again?!? Right now all I can do is guess. Many times I am troubled because I fear I am not doing enough with him, or thinking I am not doing it right. That’s all since I don’t really know what I am doing! Then sometimes I wonder if I am pushing him too hard driven by my desire to see him improve…it’s still a guessing game!

Though basically shut in (except for two hours each morning) I am still busy. My hands are pretty full with writing and working on line. But I miss contact with people. Yesterday I did turn skype on for awhile and visited with a pastor from Kenya. Before we hung up he prayed for Chris..that was cool. Then I called in to my friend’s radio broadcast (out of Arkansas) and they prayed for Chris as well…other than that there was no contact with people yesterday. I can literally go days without any physical touch…

When I feel alone and alone-ness tries to swallow me I have to remind myself that He is here with me, helping me with day to day struggles. He won’t abandon me mid trip! He never says, “I just can’t handle it today.” Just like I don’t tell Chris that! God has the same faithfulness toward me (and more) as I have for my own son. He never washes His hands of the situation and says, “Do what you think best.” He’s hear to constantly guide me in every decision. And I guess really that even includes the therapeutic things I attempt to do with Chris.

Well, there ya go I talked myself into being fine for one more day! lol! He’s with me and that is worth a lot. He’s not too busy with a job or other responsibilities to walk with me through the fire. Because it can get complicated real fast! Like last night when my grandson was ill. I lay awake praying for him and for Ronella and Shawn to know have wisdom for the situation. It’s not just Chris that I deal with each day, although that is heavy. Life still goes on too! I have all the day to day stuff to deal with too. And He remains faithful…

Today that is what I will hold on to tightly…He is faithfully walking with me just as I am walking through this with Chris.

Advertisements
  1. #1 by Aunt Mary on October 21, 2010 - 2:14 pm

    Hang in there, Jeanie. We are with you every day in prayer and thought and deep concern. May the Lord bless you and grant you wisdom and knowledge. YOU ARE DOING AN ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL JOB and we are so proud of you!!

    Like

    • #2 by Jeanie Olinger on October 21, 2010 - 4:43 pm

      Thanks Aunt Mary! It has been a hectic day already and it’s a good reminder that I am being carried by the prayers of others!! love ya

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: