I’ve heard a lot of comments from people saying that they don’t know how I “do it.” They try to compliment me for sticking with Chris and not just walking away and leaving him in a facility. Sorry. That just does not compute in my head! Nothing other than being with him through his furnace makes any sense. How could I abandon him when he needs me most?
I stayed 24/7 in the hospital while he was there. I slept and ate in the waiting room. Then I started rebuilding my life right from his hospital room. Really it’s been amazing some of the things that have taken place. It wasn’t until then that I began to have a lot of international connections.
When we stayed in the nursing home, I was in the room with him. The home was gracious and put us in a wing away from everyone else. They literally took care of both of us during that time! But when we moved him to Oklahoma I stayed with my daughter for awhile but spent every single day – all day long – with Chris. Then some wonderful true Christian people opened up their home and a spare bedroom to me. I stayed there for several months. It was costing me an arm and a leg in gas going back and forth so I checked out some other options.
During that time I saw an ad from a lady who just needed someone to stay in her house as she was away a lot. It was basically room and board for watching her house. While we were visiting she asked me about why I needed a place and all that. I began to tell her Chris’ story. She was shocked. She said she didn’t know what she would do if anything like that happened to her son. She said she “couldn’t” stay with him as she had a job and two houses. I did not reply.
It didn’t make sense to me that the two houses and a job were more weighty matters than her son. I don’t want that to make sense. Jobs were not important, I had three of them when Chris was involved in the accident.
I started thinking about how materialistic we have become. How could I trade two houses for my son? I’d rather live on the street or in a box!
Isaiah 49:15 says : Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. What a promise from the Lord. There have been times during this fiery process that I felt He had forgotten me, or that He had abandoned me. And trust me I let Him know about my feelings! I tell Him exactly what I think! Yes, I have shaken my fists at Him during this ordeal. Well, there’s no point to hiding it as He already knows what I think and feel!
But after I settle down, I realize He is still there. He will not abandon. As I work patiently with Chris and wait on God…God works patiently with me! He won’t trade two houses and a job for me either! I can rest in that! He is with us.
Ps 46:7 The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah